In this talk I will grapple with Being Itself.  I don’t quite argue that backwards causation is impossible, but near enough: viz., that bilking is impossible.  If this result conflicts with the deliverances of modern physics, so much the worse for those deliverances.  As usual, I eschew all modern contrivances, such as the electric ‘word processor’.  Instead, I rely on the tried and tested tools of the philosopher’s trade: a whiteboard marker and a sturdy goat.